Is it that time of the year again already? Have I really been doing this nonsense for another year
already? Good lord.
Anyhoo, welcome, friends, to the official* Saviour of the Show’s Most Spiffing Games of 2017 list!
As always when we do a list like this, we aren’t just going to be adding new games released this year
to our lists. Instead, what we’ll be doing is talking about the games we played this year that really
tickled our pickles (ohhhhhhhhhhh yeahhhhh), whether they be brand spanking, shiny and new (and
probably still sealed on Eric’s shelf) or gloriously retro (and probably still sealed on Eric’s shelf).
Before we delve into my list, I’d like to take the time to thank all of you, our fans, who make doing
this show as entertaining as it is. We’ve really created a great community or retro/utter stupidness
fans over on the old Facebox, and I really do feel like we’ve got to know a great deal of you, as well
as you’ve gotten to know us through the nonsense we spout on a fortnightly basis. It means more
than you know that you continue to listen to the show every time we put one out.
I’d like to also take the time to mention that this year was the first time that all of us Factory Sealors
actually got to meet up in person. We talked about it at length on the podcast earlier this year, but it
truly was a fantastic experience to meet up with newbie Mike ‘Will of the People’ Tyson, Yombo
‘Smooth Area’ Raganshire and a man I’ve known for a long time and never actually met before,
AmERICa Pederson. We had an absolute blast, and it’s a shame we can’t all be in the same room
every week to record the show.
With that said, and sentiment out of the way, it is time to begin my glorious list.
Jockbunz at the ready? Good – prepare thy tits as well and let’s get started.
*Based on stats prepared and researched by Curtis industries
10) Final Fantasy VII
I know what you’re thinking. Final Fantasy VII, on Dan’s list? Never!
Ok, ok, so I love Final Fantasy VII. That’s well documented. Everyone knows about all of the ghost
attacks that happened when the Final Fantasy VII Remake was announced and I found out about it.
It’s all common knowledge.
So why on earth does it grace my list again this year? Well, because, quite simply, this was the year
we actually played through all three discs of Final Fantasy VII for the show itself.
That’s three whole episodes dedicated to one of the best games of all time. That’s a lot of Aeristh-th-
th. That’s more than a little Ket Shee. I’m sure there’s more stupid things we talked about on those
three episodes too that I’ve forgotten about due to brain dribblage from too much Factory Sealed.
It was great to go through all three of these discs with a fine tooth comb, going along for the ride
with my fellow hosts. This series also marked the time when we officially adopted a Mike Tyson as
our fourth host, after the sheer weight of fan mail being thrown through our doors meant we had to
cave to the pressures and add him, or risk a revolt on our hands.
IT WAS THE WILL OF THE PEOPLE!!! Yeah, right, Mike….
9) Resident Evil 3
A couple of years back, I wouldn’t have even contemplated playing a survival horror game, let alone
add one to my list. Thankfully, things change (most likely my underpants) and I’ve grown to have a
new-found appreciation of some of the classics in the genre.
Resident Evil 3 doesn’t particularly grace my list because it is an amazing game; in this case, it graces
my list because of the sheer hilarity of the episode where we talked about this one.
That’s not to take away from the game itself; Nemesis stalking you through the game was a tense
experience that really heightened the game, and – of course – Resi 3 also outdid itself on the utterly
ludicrous puzzle front which all horror game protagonists can’t seem to possibly get away from.
When we talked about this one on the show, somehow Nemesis ended up transforming into Ronnie
Pickering. No, I don’t know how these things happen either.
8) Crash Bandicoot: The N Sane Trilogy
Nothing quite scratched my nostalgic itch more this year than the Crash N Sane Trilogy.
Announced a couple of years back as a big surprise out of the blue, the game instantly went to a
first-day purchase for me and a lot of people around the world who loved Crash Bandicoot.
Thankfully the gamble paid off; everyone seemed to really love Crash’s new lick of paint and aside
for a few issues with some wonky physics making the first game absolutely rock hard to finish,
Crash’s return went off with a bit of a bang.
Personally I loved it – I’d still argue that Crash 2 and Crash 3 are the superior games in the package,
but this was a great deal any way you swing it with three games in one box, packed with secrets and
all the box smashing you could ever ask for.
Now, where’s that Spyro remaster?
7: Streets of Rage Remake
I will keep going on about this one until someone else plays it. I know that’s pretty difficult given that
SEGORRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR erased pretty much any trace of it from the net, but I’m
sure you can find it somewhere.
Not by any means an official Streets of Rage game, the Remake was created, from the ground up, by
a bunch of fans who wanted to create a branching SOR game that spanned the first three games and
included new levels, characters, enemies and loads of other neat stuff too.
Unfortunately for the game it was, almost immediately after being finished, pulled down from the
internet by SEGORRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR who waved their cease and desist letters triumphantly and
shelved what was a fantastic experience.
I was one of the lucky few who managed to bag a copy of it before it got pulled down, and I revisited
it a bit earlier this year to find out whether it was still as good as I remember.
It was – I’m hoping that Sega is secretly working behind closed doors to give this game the similar
treatment to what Sonic Mania got.
6: Nier Automata
If there’s a game I find difficult to describe, it’s this one. Part hack and slash romp, part open world
exploration, part RPG and mostly mindfuck, this game will get its hooks deep into you and keep you
coming back for more.
I honestly don’t want to give anything away at all for this one; it’s one of those games you simply just
have to experience for yourself to understand why people consider it to be so good.
In the immortal words of Eric Pederson: “GETTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTTT ITTTTTTTTTTTTTT!”.
5: Yakuza Zero
How many games can you be one minute singing karaoke, then the next be smashing in a dude’s
face with a neon sign?
Yakuza is one of those series I’ve always heard was really good, but given how long it’s been out, it’s
always been hard to find a place to jump in and experience it for myself.
Yakuza 0, however, is a prequel to the series, making it the ideal starting point. After a shaky start
where I wasn’t sure what on earth was going on, I soon found myself loving the tale of Kiryu and
Majima. This game consistently surprised me with how good its plot was; I found myself wanting to
get back to the world just to find out what was happening.
Unfortunately this proved difficult as Yakuza 0 is packed with a ridiculous amount of insanely deep
side quests, including a completely soul-crushingly addictive minigame where you have to run a
cabaret club. I’ve lost hours to that one.
If you’ve never played a Yakuza game before, I’d heartily recommend this one as a starting point.
4: Sonice the Hedgepig Mania
Wait, can you hear that? If you listen, very carefully, you can hear the faint sound of buttrock drifting
over from the town of Lincoln.
Mike’s stunning, flawless buttrock renditions of Sonic aside, Sonic Mania, which was released this
year, proved that there’s still life in the old hedgepig yet.
A fascinating game in many ways, Sonic Mania was developed almost entirely by a team of fans who
have been creating fan games of Sonic for years on end. After being impressed with the custom
engine Christian Whitehead had made for Sonic fan games, Sega hired him to do ports of Sonic CD
for mobile, then afterwards also set him about making a brand new 2D Sonic game for modern
Thank god they did. Christian and his team proved they were more than up to the task, delivering
possibly the best Sonic game ever made. Yes, even better than Sonice the Hedgepig 3 and Knerkles
3: Horizon Zero Dawn
When Horizon Zero Dawn was first announced, it looked great. Here was a brand new IP which
showed a lot of promise, showcasing a post-post apocalyptic world which happened to be inhabited
by mother-freakin’ giant robot dinosaurs. Which you could shoot with a bow. On paper, it looked
When it came out, it proved that games can indeed live up to their hype. Although it suffered from
poor traversal mechanics in its open world (possibly due to having played Breath of the Wild first),
the rest of the game is absolutely superb.
What I loved the most about Horizon was its world building, lore and storyline. It was such an
engrossing story taking place in a world that, while sci-fi and fantastical, was still grounded in a
reality and 100% believable.
I really can’t wait to see what they do with this one when the inevitable sequel is released. Here’s hoping that there’s a new antagonist named Metallic Ronnie Pickering.
2: Zelda Breath of the Mints
Is there anything I can say about Zelda which hasn’t already been said? This one got multiple game
of the year awards for a reason.
I had an absolute blast earlier this year when I played Breath of the Wild on my Wii U. Here was a
game that was the ultimate open-world sandbox; an amazing, living, breathing world where the
physics are so on-point you can literally use a metal sword to fry bokoblins with lightning.
There’s so much to love here. The feeling of conquering a shrine which has plagued you for a good
hour. The thrill of exploring, and finding something new. The inventive dungeon design. Becoming
such as badass, you can kill those goddamn guardians which have been handing you your arse all
game. The list goes on and on and on.
I must have put a good 40-50 hours into Breath of the Wild, and still haven’t seen everything. If you
have a Switch or an old Wii U gathering dust, this game is 100% a must buy.
1: Persona 5
When I played Breath of the Wild early this year, I thought there was absolutely no way anything
else would beat it for the top spot on my GOTY list. Then along came Persona 5.
I’d always been extremely intrigued by the Persona series, but just never got round to dabbling. This
year, I thought it was about time to rectify that mistake.
I’m so glad I did. I’ve been trying to get everyone to listen to me all year long about how good this
game is (nobody is listening, but I don’t care!) and – I say this sincerely – Persona 5 isn’t just the best
game I played this year, it’s one of the best games I have ever played.
The characters in this are just so, so good. You go on a huge journey with all of them through some
of the most stylishly-presented gameplay I’ve ever seen. It plays with some extremely dark themes
throughout, making this so much more than a lifestyle simulator that some dismiss it as.
The lifestyle aspects of Persona 5 are, likewise, also a blast to play. Levelling up your social abilities is
just as fun as levelling up your battle abilities and they all lead to sweet rewards like building up your
friendship with the other characters.
I don’t want to go on too much about this game and how good it is, but if I had to sum it up in one
phrase, it is this: it’s really, really, really, not shite.